Cancer’s impact on the body and the mind: Amber’s story 💖

When Amber was diagnosed with breast cancer at 26, she felt numb. It was a form of self preservation. 

“I think my mind was almost protecting me by shutting a lot of my emotions off, so that I could cope with what was happening.”

Because of her diagnosis, she had to undergo surgery, egg collection, chemotherapy and radiotherapy. Whilst she was physically going through so much, she was in survival mode mentally. It was post treatment that hit her the hardest. She had to adjust to a new version of herself, and process the reality of the last 6 months. 

There were times when opening up felt really difficult, almost impossible. 

“It’s easy to start feeling like a burden, even when people around you love and care about you deeply.”

Sometimes, Amber felt guilty for carrying such difficult news, when everyone else was living normal lives in comparison. Friends would share happy updates, and she would hold back sharing her honest feelings about her own state of mind, worried she’d bring down the mood. 

One of the hardest subjects for Amber to confront was when she had to do IVF. A lot of her friends had babies, or were moving through different stages of life. It was something she found difficult to think about. She was happy for her friends of course, but at the same time, she was grieving parts of her own future and the uncertainty that came with being diagnosed with cancer. 

“I’ve learned that two emotions can exist at once – feeling happy for the people you love, and feeling sadness towards what you’re personally facing. Comparison really is the thief of joy.”

Amber did notice just how connected her mind and body felt during treatment and beyond. When she was struggling emotionally, her body struggled with her. On days when she felt most mentally exhausted, she felt physically weak and tired too. It was as though her body was carrying the weight of her emotions, and looking after her mental health became just as important as looking after her physical.

“Looking after your mental health shouldn’t just be done when everything gets too much.”

Amber’s body went through cancer, but her brain is what really kept her going. Her mindset was her strongest tool for survival, strength, and recovery.

One of the biggest things that helped Amber during her treatment was simply allowing herself to feel her emotions when they arose, instead of pushing them down. When she would ignore her feelings, they only felt heavier – allowing herself to cry, be angry, or admit that she was struggling meant she could properly process what she was going through. 

“Cancer feels incredibly isolating, but I realised people can only support you if you let them.”

Something that really helped Amber throughout treatment was her support network still treating her like herself. Cancer changed things, but loved ones creating a low pressure environment, sitting with her, listening to her, and letting her feel whatever she needed to feel made her feel safe and supported. 

Small things made a difference too; getting outside when she could, having something to look forward to, and having conversations that weren’t about cancer. They were all moments that reminded her that there was still life outside of treatment.

And now, Amber is still prioritising her health. She meditates every day, helping her step out of her thoughts, and gives her a moment of calm to not worry about the future or replay her past. She’s more honest about how she’s feeling with her loved ones, and doesn’t pretend to be okay when she isn’t. And she journals every day, which helps clear her mind and process her emotions. A huge part of her journaling is practising gratitude.

“Even in my darkest days, I’ve found some light. I take that into every day practice now. Life looks beautiful when you are grateful for the smallest things.”

Amber’s story is a reminder that looking after your mental and physical wellbeing are necessary. Prioritising your health means taking control of feeling your best, sharing when times are tough and listening to your body. Checking your chest is a part of that too. Get to know your normal – and if in doubt, get it checked out.